Welcome to the land of Feh.

Finals?

Wed, 02 Dec 2009 20:45:01 GMT

Yikes, I am so behind in class. Except not really, but DAMN I feel out of sync. Keep meaning to study and just end up futzin' around on the internet. I mean, I've got this, right? I kick some serious math-butt. Physics is another story, but I'm still way ahead of the curve in my class -- and for the past 5 quizzes I've gotten 9/10. So I should perhaps stop panicking, and actually make some headway on my studying.

On a sort-of-related note; I can't continue taking Music Theory after this term. Which is lame, because they're going to be doing some really intense scale studies. Something I've always wanted to pound into my head until I can recall it instantly. Alas, it is no more. Math and science-y related only classes for the rest of my college career, *sniff*. Well, for this degree anyway.

Having some major issues sleeping lately, which is doing fuck-all for my concentration. It's kind of fun (who am I kidding? I love being sleep-deprived.), but terribly distracting. I'd like to manage some sort of regular sleep schedule, but it's just far too dreadful to think that I'd have a set bed time. Yeesch.

I need to get a hobby, one that doesn't require constant attention (math, accordion, drawing) to be good at. Or maybe I could figure out some sort of schedule of maintenance for all of 'em. Good in theory, but I am far too scatter-brained to pull that off right now. If only there was some sort of computer program that would do it for me. ...wait, IS there some sort of computer program to do that for me?

jumping on the ST bandwagon

Sun, 06 Sep 2009 01:54:23 GMT

Your results:
You are Jean-Luc Picard

Jean-Luc Picard		60%
Data		60%
James T. Kirk (Captain)		60%
An Expendable Character (Redshirt)		55%
Uhura		50%
Spock		50%
Chekov		45%
Mr. Scott		45%
Will Riker		40%
Deanna Troi		40%
Geordi LaForge		40%
Beverly Crusher		25%
Leonard McCoy (Bones)		20%
Worf		0%
Mr. Sulu		0%

A lover of Shakespeare and other
fine literature. You have a decisive mind
and a firm hand in dealing with others.

Click here to take the "Which Star Trek character am I?" quiz...

Overdue update

Mon, 16 Mar 2009 11:31:30 GMT

Heh, it's been awhile since I've updated, as Sherrie has just pointed out to me. So... what is new with me? Unfortunately, I've been a big unemployed loser who spends a lot of her time on the computer, playing incredibly pointless games. But... there are advances that I'm taking, too. Like... um...

Well, my relationship with my mother has improved so incredibly much. It's exciting, because I've always wanted that connection, that approval from her. And now, I have it. Wooo! It's only taken us 27 years to get to that point.

Progress in the accordion is slow but steady. Once I realized that I don't really want to do anything but make my own songs, it's been a lot easier. Still wish I could read music, but that'll come later.

And also! On Wednesday, I'm going on a 2-3 week vacation with Owen. We'll be going through Utah and Colorado mostly, and we're going to see big cool rocks and he's psyched that I'm bringing the accordion with me, so hopefully I'll have some practice time in Goblin Valley.

God that was incredibly dull, I'm sure. But I suppose I'm pretty boring, so what can one expect?

Sheesh

Mon, 01 Dec 2008 03:06:38 GMT

I don't want to work today.
It's a good thing I am working, because otherwise I would be broke and couldn't pay my bills or feed my cat, but there MUST be a better way to make money.
Eh, probably not at this point. I shouldn't really bitch about only having to work 16 hours or so a week and be able to support myself. And I'm certainly not ready to try and earn a living through my music or doodles. But...?
I've got it good, though. Even easy. But there's just something so soul-crushing about waiting tables. At least I like to smile.

Sheesh

Fri, 21 Nov 2008 01:57:54 GMT

God, I'm sick again. I only managed to be healthy for three days after two weeks of illness, and now I'm back to runny nose and sore throat.
Sheesh, this is exhausting.

cannot sleep

Mon, 17 Nov 2008 22:25:02 GMT

Struck with a bout of insomnia? Man, I grow tired of the sleep-for-twelve-hours for two days than sleep-for-three-hours for two rhythm I've somehow managed to slip into.
Still... sleep-deprivation is pretty fun. I guess I shouldn't bitch too hard.
Life has been strange and turbulent and strangely... edifying? I suppose I should be grateful for that aspect.
Still haven't been able to create for shit these days, but I think I need to re-establish some sort of schedule? I'm so used to someone else being my task master, it's really hard to step into that role. But I suppose I'm ready, and I'm certainly willing. Authenticity, here I come...?

Grrr.

Wed, 22 Oct 2008 09:25:09 GMT

Block. block. block.
I'm only working two days, and I haven't really done anything to reach my goals. I just have no mental energy for creation. Boo-hoo. I have managed to read about 20 books though.

Sun, 24 Aug 2008 15:32:10 GMT

Sometimes I just need to remind myself that it's all choice. I can drop everything and walk away whenever I choose.

Woo-hoo!

Fri, 06 Jun 2008 05:17:22 GMT

Salman Rushdie is coming to town!
Well, almost. He'll be in Beaverton.

passing time w/ a quiz....

Wed, 21 May 2008 22:07:29 GMT

Your Personality is Very Rare (INFP)

Your personality type is dreamy, romantic, elegant, and expressive.

Only about 5% of all people have your personality, including 6% of all women and 4% of all men

You are Introverted, Intuitive, Feeling, and Perceiving.

How Rare Is Your Personality?

Elegant and romantic, eh? Not necessarily adjectives I would use to describe myself.

dark-eyed and morose.

Fri, 02 May 2008 10:41:29 GMT

I've been so terribly, terribly moody. Which only exasperates the situation. I guess I'm in a kind of state of mourning. Now that I'm finished with my comic, a serious chapter has ended in my life. I feel sort of groundless and ineffectual.
Perhaps my visit home will lift my spirits?
Doubtful, but I'm not feeling the usual stress that Lawrence usually conjures for me. True, I did burst into tears at the thought of phoning my mother (where the hell that came from, I'm still trying to sort out), but I'm not worried about dealing with any ghosts from my past. Perhaps I've been able to provide them with a proper burial?
Maybe I'll focus on that. That seems to make me pleased.

Extra fancy!

Tue, 15 Apr 2008 18:32:53 GMT

In honor of me finally completing my comic, I got a new tattoo. I would include a picture, but I gave my camera away to a photographer friend in need.
It's neat, tho.

Fri, 28 Mar 2008 02:18:25 GMT

Why are people so interested in my sexual orientation? People I barely know are constantly asking me what gender I'm into. I feel weird, because I'm instinctively evasive with my answer. Mostly because I'm not really interested in naked-touchy time with any gender at this time, but it also strikes me as this incredibly banal question, and I hate giving a straight answer to a banal question. <--- pun slightly intended

I am sad.

Thu, 06 Mar 2008 20:39:44 GMT

Gary Gygax, man.

Tue, 04 Mar 2008 15:55:11 GMT

tv + cheez-its = the death of me.

Thu, 13 Dec 2007 23:13:24 GMT

I'm sick. And in the strangest headspace. Really, it's like I'm miles away from my body... and yet residing in it.
Weird.

Awake!

Mon, 29 Oct 2007 17:37:46 GMT

For no good reason. I should be sleeping... or in the very least performing the tasks I need to perform before I go to Japan. ...but instead I just kinda sit here and drool on myself.
Durrrr.... click.... thump.

Blargh.

Mon, 10 Sep 2007 13:31:33 GMT

I have all these people that I owe letters/e-mails to, and this would be the perfect time to keep up on my correspondence
but I'm just in such a fowl fucking mood.
There are days at work where I must project this "abuse me" vibe... 'cause people sure like to heap all their psychological shit on me.
I'm just trying to work, make some money, earn those survival tix..
I'm not out to be an asshole or make you feel like less of a human being.
When I tell you "no", it's not because I'm a sadistic cunt; it's because I'm efficient.

Goddamn humans.

Unfortunate epiphany

Fri, 15 Jun 2007 16:59:34 GMT

Realized this morning, as I was drifting off to sleep, that Home Shopping Network is my mother figure.

That's gonna keep me up for awhile....
shudder.

Sad for me.

Sun, 10 Jun 2007 04:02:56 GMT

I have shingles of the face. It is very painful and I look like a troglodyte.
Boo hoo. Poor fucking me.

Odd...

Sun, 06 May 2007 05:24:16 GMT

I'm reading a book about horses.
And enjoying it.
Bizarre.

Fri, 30 Mar 2007 14:52:31 GMT

Sat, 10 Mar 2007 15:38:30 GMT

Wed, 07 Mar 2007 03:18:51 GMT

I miss having a huge honking dictionary around. Wikipedia's good for an hour or two, but I really miss delving into a good OED. Hard copy, you know? Something you can sit in your lap while drinking tea, losing yourself in the words.

That's probably just me, tho.

Mon, 19 Feb 2007 03:18:02 GMT

Did you know eyelashes can get split ends? Well, they can. Weird.
Fuckin' Mardi Gras hit work last night. Never-ending sea of drunken ASShats. I wish them all implosions.